A night at the opera

Yesterday, after a failed attempt to go see Peter the Great's collection of oddities in the Museum of Natural Sciences (deformed babies in jars! hurrah!), an extended period of lolling in the grass with friends while babushkas looked at us and whispered to friends, an overpriced yet yummy dinner at Cafe Idiot, complete with complimentary vodka shots and an overly slow waitress (we had to bolt because I was bad and snagged a couple Louis L'Amour books from their bookshelf... not sure if I was allowed to do that, or if the cowboy books were worth it) and an extended hunt for ice cream, we decided to go to the opera, where they were putting on one of the great pieces of Russian literature / drama, Evgeny Onegin.

I haven't read it, and it was in Russian, but as far as I gathered, the story goes: There are two sisters, Olga and Tatiana. Olga is a prankster. She has a beau, who I believe is named Vladimir, and he has a friend, Evgeny Onegin. Vladimir brings Onegin over to meet the girls, and Tatiana falls in love with him. They stroll through the garden, while Vladimir sings his love to Olga. Later that night, Tatiana is besieged by her love for Onegin and writes him a letter. He gets it, and then tells her something along the lines of he is too worldly, and can only love her like a sister (he was singing Mozhe Bit a lot, which means maybe, but I'm not sure what that referred to.) She is in despair. There is a ball. Tatiana avoids him. He flirts with Olga. Someone comes and sings to Tatiana, and I'm not sure about what. Vladimir calls Onegin out on the flirting with Olga and challenges him to a duel, which they both very sadly participate in, but Vladimir is shot and dies. Lament. Years later, Onegin comes back, finds Tatiana married to a prince, is like "What have I done?", goes to her, professes his love, she resists, then confesses, then runs off. Curtain. Applause. Very beautiful. Music by Tchaikovsky and lovely singing.

Problem was, in the ball scenes, there were random ballerinas that came on and danced. That would have been fine, except... there was a male dancer among them who was SO tall and SO proud looking and had the TIGHTEST, most translucent tights I have ever seen. It was actually distracting. I generally like to get to know a guy a little before I find out length, girth and religious orientation. Wah. My friends agreed on this. The whole audience tittered whenever he came out. It was still bad when he was wearing pants, and the fact that he was a whole head taller than the rest of the dancers didn't help. Eegah.